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Brief synopsis:

When the England manager has a heart attack, football's top brass turn to Mike Bassett (basically no one else wanted the job). Bassett is the sort of old fashioned manager who writes his team on the back of his cigarette packet.

Even with troubled football genius Tonka Tonkinson back from retirement and off the booze, England lose Mike's first two games in charge. His team struggle to a goal-less draw in the final qualifying match but, thanks to a fluke result elsewhere, England qualify for the finals in Brazil.

In South America things go from bad to worse. The results are pathetic, the team captain is arrested and Tonka has a fling with a beautiful woman… who turns out to be a man. However, inspired by the words of Rudyard Kipling, Mike makes an impassioned plea for the country to get behind him - fans, press, players… even his wife. The rousing words stir the team… but even though they play the game of their lives, the scores are still level with five minutes remaining. Bassett makes his final, brave, and some would say stupid decision.. to bring on Tonka. Fired up, Tonka comes off the bench to try to restore pride to the nation.

Photo: Tom Collins

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